Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Won't Happen...Until...

HONG KONG:— "The survival of the human race depends on its ability to find new homes elsewhere in the universe because there's an increasing risk that a disaster will destroy the Earth, world-renowned scientist Stephen Hawking said Tuesday.

The British astrophysicist told a news conference in Hong Kong that humans could have a permanent base on the moon in 20 years and a colony on Mars in the next 40 years."

Until...We're forced into it. There is no pioneer spirit left in America, forget the Euro's, and the Chinamen and Russkies won't have the technology until after we hand it over. The Japanese do what we tell them to do, and we're not pushing very hard to venture into space because space is dangerous and the Loons have declared that if it ain't safe enough for a school teacher then it ain't safe enough.

No, it'll take a Liberal Democrat in the Oval Office to make it so, because Conservatives go along with anything that makes enough sense, and Liberals go along with anything a Blowjob-Billy-type tells them to.

Hundreds of civilians were wasted when Squirts dropped bomb after bomb to distract the public from THAT BLACK DRESS, but an obliging media paid little mind and the loons sniffled that it was indeed a shame they forced him to be so mean.

Get another such used-car-salesman in office, convince him that it's in HIS best interest to launch us back into space with a vigor resembling the mid-60's, and like the French say, viola.

Or...an imminent disaster that awakens us all. Forget the HollyLoon versions of asteroid strikes and other nonsensical slapdashes into Neverland; we know where all the big rocks are, would have years to swat one out of the way should it go rogue, and even the stat tables tell us that we've another 40 million years to go before such an event would be possible.

Mexicans over-running California and Texas and Arizona might be the last straw, the wakeup call. Since nobody wants to be an astronaut anymore, there's the PERFECT opportunity for them to walk into yet another profession that is being shunned by Americans. Build the starships, measure them for spacesuits, stock the rockets with enough guacamole to last a lifetime, and it's two-birds-with-one-stone.

Beaners In Space. Has a nice ring to it.

And as far as Hawking barking for the old saw that we'll eventually run out of room, well, since we're the only creatures in the universe given the knowledge of our eventual demise, you'd think that we'd have been long on our way to learning how to cope with limited resources or been further down the road to discovering new earths. Since neither has ever been high on the list of things to do, we're not as smart as need be, or too smart for our own good. Hawking raises valid concerns but looking far into the future isn't something beings imbued with the awareness of a finite existance can be any good at.

Why bother? We'll be long dead. We can't even cope with the probability of Social Security running out of money and he wants us to look century's ahead?

Cue Twilight Zone music and Fade Out...



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