"Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadimmerbulb (L) shakes hands with UN Secretary General Kofi (Oil-For-Food-Impressario) Annan during their meeting in Tehran. Annan has won a pledge from President Mahmoud Ahmadimmerbulb to support a UN resolution bringing peace to Lebanon but was warned Iran would not suspend sensitive nuclear work before negotiations unless all of the entire Milky Way Galaxy converted to Islam right this very instant. General Annan assured Ahmadimmerbulb that the process was well underway, and asked for more time to receive word back from Alpha Centauri. "Crop circles found in France indicate that the Centaurians are most likely onboard with the conversion gig," Annan said, "But we were dealt a staggering blow to peace when American President George Bush used his influence to remove Pluto from the list of available planets, and no one is quite certain precisely how the Plutonians will respond..."
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