Messenger Travel Advisory

Passport Rules have changed for U.S. citizens traveling to certain countries.

In the face of record-breaking demand for passports, there have been longer than expected processing times of passport applications. As a result, the United States Government recently announced an accommodation for air travel. U.S. citizens traveling to Canada, Mexico, the Caribbean, and Bermuda who have applied for, but not yet received, passports can temporarily enter and depart from the United States by air with a government-issued photo identification and Department of State official proof of application for a passport through Sept. 30, 2007.

However, please be advised that come the very moment the illegal-Mexican-amnesty bill is passed into law, processing times for THEM will become all but instantaneous. Congress has guaranteed a 24-hour turnaround from application to come-on-in, so we advise the following:

Apply for your illegal-Mexican wishing to be legal green card. After waiting the 1 days time for a favorable reply, then use this reply as means to access all borders contiguous to, or operating under the vary same standards as contiguous-to, the United States. Since even proof of application is taking up to 3 months, declaring oneself an illegal wishing to access the United States, Canada, Mexico, or the Caribbean will lower the average wait from 3-9 months down to less than 1 working day!

And for those wondering if Canada and the Caribbean will in turn recognize the proposed new status of illegal Mexicans who of course will then wish to travel to THEIR fair country's as well, rest assured that the response from the US Government has been "who gives a flying fuck they'll do as we tell them to do", and hop aboard the gravy train.

Because, identifying oneself as an illegal goes a lot farther than being allowed free access across US borders. One look at all of the perks and privileges our representatives are contemplating can only lead to EVERYONE declaring his or her self to be a poor Mexican just looking for employment.

BOTTOM LINE

Americans seeking a passport: Approximately 6 million.

Waiting Time: Anywhere from 3 to 6 months

Illegal Mexicans and their families seeking passports: 60 million

Waiting Time: Anywhere from 16-24 hours.

Never before has "no hablo" meant so very much.

DECLARE YOUR ILLEGAL STATUS NOW BEFORE THEY CATCH ON