Sunday, March 06, 2011

Cutlery Cornered

You know why a car-jacker jacks rather than getting a job and buying his own car?

Of course you do. Crooks are lazy. Crooks can lie and cheat and steal without compunction because of a glitch in their wiring, a gap in the place where honor should be.

Well, I'm proud to announce that our hammering away at Frost Cutlery has paid dividends to the point whereby old Todd and Tom and Man -Hands Sheila are becoming downright boring.

The Frost Uglyass Crap Knife watchers, of which I am A founding but certainly not THE founding member, has prevented Frost from stealing trademarks and affiliations and even points of manufacture as just yesterday old Jim hisseff made mention of getting a hold of some more "Chinese swords" to sell.

Now, Frost could sell just as many if not more knives if he'd learn something about modern cutlery, but remember...crooks are lazy. Just for example, instead of lying about how 420J2 steel isn't absolute crap by referring to it as 420J Tool Steel. the crooks at Frost could spend time talking about the new jimpings, and ricasso's and choils that make up modern blades, but since the crooks at Frost wouldn't know a jimping from little baby bunting they do what crooks the world over do.

Take the easy way out and steal for a living. Tell your customers all about modern knife grinds? How's about the new particle metal technology that has been sweeping the country? The new sub-micron diamond polishing pastes for unparalleled sharpness? Nah. That's work. Learnin' alla them new fangled sci-en-ti-fi-cal names.

But learn they long as it's easy...

On February 24 a Thursday ago we made mention of the "new" 'Lachlainn' knives Frost was pushing, and alluded to the fact that World of Warcraft has a critter by that name and the critter is a mad dog. Well sir, Stuttering Todd mentioned that this morning and that means they are paying attention, and paying attention is the best way to shine a light on a crook. Make him get a job, learn his craft, trade honest work for honest recompense.

Will they do it? Focus on the true and incredibly interesting aspects of modern cutlery rather than lie and cheat and steal? Probably not. But at least they've throttled back and have been at least somewhat cautious in who's intellectual properties they swipe.

And before I forget lets all make ready for the special presentation of Cutlery Corner come this Monday, March 7. Yes, Frost has finally figured out that March 7 is on a Monday and is pimping what will be the first ever theft in broad daylight he's ever attempted on the ION Network.

And we leave you with a direct quote from Todd Boone:
"...Can you even imagine what kind of money you're gonna make on this deal from us? These knives for this money? The sort of profit you're gonna have? Especially if you sell them."

Pictured: From top to bottom: James A. Frost, Stuttering Todd Boone, Senile Tom O'Dell, and Sheila Man-Hands Travis.

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