Florida Cops Get Missile Launcher in 'Kicks for Guns' Exchange: UPDATE

ORLANDO, Fla. — Police were hoping for a good turnout at their "Kicks for Guns" sneaker exchange Friday, but they weren't expecting to get a surface-to-air missile launcher.

An Ocoee man showed up and exchanged the 4-foot-long launcher for size-3 Reebok sneakers for his daughter, the Orlando Sentinel reported.

Taking advantage of the exchange's no-questions-asked policy, the man was not identified. He told the Orlando Sentinel that he found the weapon in a shed he tore down last week.

"I didn't know what to do with it, so I brought it here," he told the newspaper. "I took it to three dumps to try to get rid of it and they told me to get lost."

Besides the missile launcher police collected more than 250 guns. They were all exchanged for sneakers or $50 gift certificates.

Orlando Police officials offered no comment to the query regarding the rash of gun-thefts that usually precede such turn-ins, nor any indication concerning how many firearms had been stolen from officers.

"How they get 'em ain't none of our business," An anonymous officer responded, "but many are worth a lot more than 50 bucks and the ones usually stolen from one of us gets returned so everybody wins."

Representatives of several Dunkin Doughnut franchises in the greater Orlando area did say that the annual turn-in helps them greatly with regards to cleaning their Lost & Found collection of police handguns found in toilet facilities, and that the staff receives all of the gift certificate proceeds and looks upon it as a regular bonus.

"Our store finds two or three Glocks a week," Edward Sprinkles owner of the Orlando bypass Dunkin Doughnuts said to reporters, "the cops are too embarrassed to say they leave 'em in the john so they get reported as stolen and it's nice that our working kids can get some sneakers back in return for the things. The guns are so crudded out and dirty it isn't like they can be used for anything so running shoes for scrap metal is a good trade."

THE UPDATE PART

Well whoops on my tired old ass

Here I thought the story and accompanying pic were enough to laugh at sans explanation, but it seems that some folken are up in arms over a FRICKIN INERT OLD TOW TUBE.

What was turned in was not a firearm. Just as the barrel of your gun is a barrel and not a gun.

Sheesh but why do I even read some of the email.