" My 10-month-old son has the cutest FOID card.
Howard David Ludwig -- affectionately nicknamed Bubba -- received his state-issued firearm owner's identification card two weeks ago.
The wallet-size card arrived about a month after his dear ol' dad correctly completed the online form and sent in the fee.
As a FOID card holder, baby Bubba can own a firearm, as well as ammunition, in Illinois.
He can also legally transport an unloaded weapon, though he can't yet walk, so that's not an issue.
The plastic card has a picture of Bubba giving a toothless grin in the upper right corner. It includes his name, address and date of birth -- 6/14/2006.
The FOID card lists his height (2 feet, 3 inches) and his weight (20 pounds).
His signature is superimposed at the bottom. Since Bubba can't sign his name, I simply placed a pen in his hand. He made the scribble.
Within weeks after Bubba's birth, my father called with news. "I bought him a gun," he said.
"What?" I asked.
Grandpa Ludwig, an avid trap shooter, explained he wanted an heirloom for his first grandson. He plans to engrave his name on the trigger guard.
When the proud grandpa walked into Mega Sports in Plainfield, the salesman asked why he was buying a gun. My dad explained it was a gift for his grandson.
"How old is the boy?" the salesman asked.
"Two weeks," the new grandpa said.
"Don't you think you should wait?" the salesman replied.
"Nah, best to do it now," the eager customer said.
About an hour later, my dad walked out of the suburban gun shop with a receipt for a 12-gauge Beretta. He picked up the 686-model shotgun the next day.
The Wife wasn't excited. Despite her Texas upbringing, she's under the impression that cloth books and footed pajamas are somehow better baby gifts.
I needed to take the appropriate steps to make sure Bubba became a legal gun owner. So, I logged on to the Illinois State Police Web site and printed the FOID application.
I filled out one for myself and another for Bubba.
It takes 30 days to process the application. I anxiously greeted the mail carrier the next four weeks, curious if the State Police would issue a FOID card to a 10-month-old.
When it finally arrived, I found my application was approved, but Bubba was rejected. I was expecting an official letter that went something like:
Attention Father of the Year,
We are not issuing a FOID card to an infant.
Love,
The Illinois State Police
Instead, I was rejected on a technicality. I forgot to check the box confirming Bubba was a U.S. citizen.
(Though I'm not entirely sure why that matters.)
Undeterred, I filled out the form again and sent in another $5.
This time, I failed to check a box indicating that I was Bubba's father. So, I filled out another form and sent in another $5.
Maybe they figured I'd give up after two failed attempts. But as a stay-at-home dad, I am used to overcoming setbacks. This was nothing compared to diaper rash.
The third time proved to be the charm.
I showed one of my dad's shooting buddies Bubba's FOID card. "Don't you need to pass a test or something to get this?" he said.
"No," I replied, somewhat surprised that he didn't know the 1968 Firearm Owner's Identification Act forward and backward.
Really, there's no reason why Bubba should not have a FOID card. The program is designed to keep guns away from convicted felons, those convicted of domestic battery or domestic violence and anyone subject to an active order of protection.
My 10-month-old son hasn't broken any of these rules ... yet.
The larger question is why would the State Police issue a FOID card to anyone under 18?
Even with a valid FOID card, Bubba can't go into a gun shop and buy a long gun until he is 18. He has to wait until 21 to buy a handgun. (Though Chicago bans handguns entirely, through a local ordinance.)
Anyone under 21 can shoot a gun without a FOID card.
The law permits the exemption so long as a FOID card holder supervises the youngsters.
Thus, father-son turkey hunts are legal as long as dad has his FOID card.
I called the National Rifle Association and told them of my scheme.
"Oh my," the NRA spokeswoman said.
Her surprise came knowing Illinois has some of the toughest gun laws in the country. Illinois tacks on all sorts of state restrictions on top of the federal guidelines, she said.
I also called the State Police, who said they followed the law as it's written.
"There is nothing in the FOID Act or any of the rules that says anything about age restrictions," said Lt. Scott Compton.
Say a group of 15-year-old boys wants to go hunting rabbits unsupervised. If their parents approve the hunt, then the boys would need FOID cards, Compton said.
I'm not about to approve any unsupervised hunting or trap shooting for Bubba. Still, I'm glad he was able to get his FOID card.
It makes an adorable addition to his baby book."
howardaludwig@yahoo.com
Howard Ludwig is a former Daily Southtown business writer who traded his reporter's notebook for a diaper bag, becoming a stay-at-home dad.
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Well of course the wife wasn't excited. Duh. I've promised to stop ragging on Texas gals, but generally speaking they know little or nothing about firearms save for the fact that since they're Texans, most everyone should have a gun and it's free and the law all but begs you to buy a lot of 'em. Years of listening in to online chats and comments led me to believe all of the above, but it isn't just the women. This was before I became acquainted with the Fudd phenomenon and would blame the ladies without knowing that half if not more of ALL gun owners believed that shotguns and 10" barreled Smiths were all one should be allowed to own because anything else was terror-stuff. I'd like to think that years of calling them on their lack of understanding had a little to do with one or two folks pulling their heads from the sand and awakening to the real world. All of those ludicrous laws were passed when the vast majority of gun owners were asleep at the switch.
Back to the story. So what. The baby, nor anyone else should NEED a FOID, but this is in Ill-Annoy so there goes the neighborhood. As a little fellow, there were tons of pics taken of me with guns my father and his brothers brought back from WWII, and the women would tsk-tsk but this was before they all got the memo telling them that everything is dangerous and they should be weepy at the drop of a hat, just because. MY wife is not like that, and I hope neither is yours. Fact of the matter is I wouldn't be with a woman who didn't understand what firearms mean to a free society.
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