Saturday, January 08, 2011

Mr. Boone Is Back From Deer Huntin' So Katie Bar That There Door Cuz It's Tahm Fer Cutlery Corner...

(Cue background sniffling and coughing and talking...)

"..And ya'll know what this (sniff, cough) knife looks like, dontcha? I know lots of ya'll out there are reckanizin' this knife.."

Todd Boone describing one of the products available from the "Inventory Special", CCN-21450. One hundred and forty-nine pot-steel knives available for $160...and that's ah um hardly a buck and change apiece, the "reckaniziable" knife was reminiscent of a Buck Mayo folder, but then again, virtually ALL Frost Cutlery products are knockoffs of real blades so why pick out this one in particular?

That's easy. Old Man Jim just got hisseff some brandy new Chinaman knaahvs in from Chinamanland and is tickled pink that Mr. Chin went and copied that there Buck to a T. 

And was the background sniffling and coughing and talking more noticeable than usual? A bit, yes it was. Bad-Hair-Day Todd admitted that perhaps he got hisseff a touch of the in-flew-enza, just like most of the crew done caught. There's so much sniffling and coughing and talking that you know every last cast member of Cutlery Corner is a chain smoker, and while that's their business it is a tad disconcerting to constantly listen to it. 

"And keep in mind that there's only a hundred of 'em and that don't take inta considerations if anybody buys two. Somebody or, ah um ah someone buys multiples than there'll be less than a hundred of them. How many less I don't know because I can't tell ya'll how many anybody will be buyin'. In other words don't go thinkin' that you are only goin' up against a hundred or ninety-nahn other folks."

"So yer gittin 10 knives fer only $29.95 an who wouldn't be buyin' bran-name knives fer $2.99 point-5 cents apiece?" (Brand name? Oh yeah; any product that Toddy can pronounce is brand-name.

"And this here's the Whitetail ah um I guess this is cutlery corners way a' spellin' extreme."

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