Saturday, September 03, 2005

Supreme Fearless Most Exalted Uulator Calls For Jihad Against Israel

"Hold it, I'm getting something now...yes...this belongs to a young lady in the audience who has a fish she calls scrappy-face. What, I embarassed you with the scrappy-face thing..."
AP file photograph of the Ayatollah Ali Khamenei perfoming in a small nightclub just outside of Las Vegas before his return from exile.

"The only way to confront the Zionist enemy is the continuation and fortification of resistance and Jihad," Ayatollah Ali Khamenei was quoted as saying Saturday in a meeting with the militant group Islamic Jihad's secretary general Ramazan Abdullah.

"Although the retreat of the Zionist regime from Gaza is short of Palestinian rights and demands, it is however a big victory that shows the inability of the occupier regime of Qods (Jerusalem)," the ISNA news agency quoted Khamenei as saying.

European officials were confronted with this latest example of what appeared to be a bellicose Iran, and one of the chief players on the EU's negotiating committee responded, "It's just a matter of time," French President Chirac told the Associated Press, "I don't want to let the cat out of the bag but one of the reasons we haven't been taking this Iranian nuclear bomb too serious is the fact that I have it on good authority the Jews are working on a force field. Kid you not, star trek shit from the get-go and the Iranians can drop all the a-bombs they want, and we all know that's the first place they aim for, eh. And since they've promised never to send one after us, why make this anything to lose sleep over, eh."

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