Silence Is Golden...

Cutlery Corner opened this morning sans audio. Yep. No Tap-tap. Toddy was standing there tapping away but in absolute silence, as the audio didn't kick in until perhaps 3 minutes had passed. Since Toddy began the show by reading from a cheap sheet of copy paper, whatever he was reading probably didn't go over all that well during the actual live presentation...most of the country gets to see the Frosted Flakes on tape delay...so instead of cutting and editing the incompetent morons just let him stand there to open the show mouthing into the abyss.

Terrible way to treat a recovering drunk. Especially when they then expect him to flick Jim's...

"We got us a Wake-Up-Call featuring The Tallywhacker...no I didn't make that up that's what they named it..."

tallywhacker - definition and meaning from Wordnik

Tallywhacker: penis ... I haven't seen his "tallywhacker" in a few years, but the last time I saw it, I was envious.

Uh huh. A Frost Cutlery knife named "The Penis". All you Fudds ordering from Mr. Jim just might be wonderin' if he'll sign his Tallywhacker for you. Call. Maybe he'll do just that. Turnabout is fair play, so then you can auteegraff YOUR Tallywhacker for him.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. Mr. Frost wants to go and sell him some Penis then git 'er done, son.

And then:

"This here's a new Frost design we're callin' the AK-47...."

Stolen of course from the Cold Steel AK-47, but what's a little thievery amongst free-ends (friends)?

UPDATE

Okay, I forced myself to stay awake...it's 5:30 now...to see how Sheila Man-Hands Travis and Tom "Senile-Sipper" O'Dell would feature Big Jim's Penis Tallywhacker, and was not disappointed.

Senile O'Dell got to the Frost Penis and stopped dead in his tracks at "Tally..." while Man-Hands fondled Jim's Tallywhacker and giggled. Classless broad that she is, instead of just moving along and saving the day, she couldn't bring herself to do more than finger James A's Tally in those giant-ass fingers, all the while wondering how to spit out the name of the bloody thing.